wow ryan really? fuk u. i give up. at one point, i had trusted you. sometimes actually had fun talkin to u, even tho u had some annoying points in time..

i dont care anymore. i dont want to know. throw away the present i had found for her after lookin for so long. bday dinner.. asking her out after dinner .. even tried seeing if theres something i could do that could have some drama-like way of asking too.. i know this is just asking u out but i wanted to make it really special.. ... whatever i dont care anymore...

came back home from tennis and saw that.. i couldnt breathe.. when i showered.. i had to stand there, water rushing down my face and body.. propping myself against the wall.. just to breathe... i cant take it anymore..

all those times ive been nice to you.. cared for u.. all the fun times we had.. conversations.. i really tried chau.. i really did.. i dont even know what to say more.. i cant even tell if it was water runin down my face or if it was tears..

MIA i go.. for the first time... even deactivating fb cuz i dont even want to see it.. even as i type this, im having trouble breathing cuz this .. this was way .. way too sudden..

im sorry..

believe or not believe.. to have come up with such an idea fully knowing the effects i believe is completely intentional.

people had told me to stop goin for u... cuz it was unequal.. not worth it... shes not good enough for me.. whatever people said.. i didnt care... to me she was worth it.. i kept trying.. toh fah geep.. not a good year to look for relationship a fortune thing had said.. i didnt believe it and kept trying... look where it got me.. got nothin out of it but a crushed heart.. what i do to deserve this? im a good guy right? im nice right? im a good friend right? how come this happens :(

but who am i kidding no one reads this stupid thing anyway.. who am i even talkin to -.-